I had to talk myself down from the ledge a couple times this week. I have just not been coping well. It scares me that I’m not. I reached out to a friend that would understand, but she had to cancel because she was in the ER (best excuse ever, right?). I was seriously messed up. 

I ended up up going for a coffee right after work and just sat in my truck and wrote. Trying to figure out how to get my poop in a group. I stayed out for about an hour and a half and then went straight to bed. I didn’t want to deal with Noble. I don’t know if I can do this. I don’t know if I can follow though with Noble’s training.

How can I expect to train a well behaved dog when I get so unstable that I can’t even look at him without getting angry? It’s plain and simple… I can’t. Maybe my parents will want him or I can sell him. Ugh… I don’t want to even think right now….


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