School’s Starting

School is starting and I’m not invited. I would be a senior right now if I was going to be going to school. The last two years of school was hell. My sophomore year, my conversion disorder got worse which led to me missing 64 days. I did all the homework and got straight A’s for the whole year. Got diagnosed with conversion disorder at the end of the school year. 

Sophomore year ended and lead to me not having a goal. I got extremely depressed which lead to me being hospitalized. Was in the psych ward for a few hours before they sent me to the ER. I had a high temperature and wasn’t eating. I was then in the surgical ward and had to have a tube inserted so that I could get the food I needed. A medication I was taking for migraines had caused me to lose my appetite for 9 days. I was in the surgical ward for 10 days, during which I met Grace and started the process to getting a service through the same program J did. 

About two weeks later, I was hospitalized again where I was diagnosed with general anxiety disorder and social anxiety. I went home and got ready for my junior year to start and the first day was a disaster. I didn’t even make it through the orientation. I then lost hope in ever being a ble to finish a day and sent to the hospital again.

A few days after I was released from the hospital, I heard that Service Canines of Montana has found me a dog. He was a black lab/border collie mix (which we would later discover him to be something completely different) and was found in a shelter’s dumpster with a litter mate. The trainer that lived near me went and brought him for me to see a few days later.

By this time, the school staff and my parents were at a loss for a solution for me to get the education I needed. I wanted to go to school no matter what. They decided to just have me do school online. I have been homeschooled on and off since I was eight and hated it. I was very much not happy with this idea. I made it a month and a half in and was failing all of my classes.

The principle then decided that the best decision would be to have me take my GED/HiSET. So they dropped me out of school and sent me to take the test. So, here I am now… Getting depressed with the fact that I won’t be joining my friends to enter their senior year. 

I am one of those strange people that absolutely adore school. The learning, sitting in class, getting up early, and having homework to do. I think it is the homeschooling that did it to me. Anyways, I ended up going with my mom to school shop for my little brother and sister. The good thing is that I have Keen to help me get through this tough time of year. I just hope it goes by fast..,

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2 thoughts on “School’s Starting

  1. Thanks for sharing. Was there no talk of alternative schooling though? Or is there not a suitable one near you? This is, for many people who struggle with mental illness, a great solution. I actually spent the last three years of my high school at an alternative school. A lot of the kids there were there because of a mental illness they struggled with. Anyway, I hope it all works out for you.

    Liked by 1 person

    • Abigail says:

      I have actually never heard of alternative schooling… I might have but I don’t remember. I live in a small town so I might not have that option.

      Like

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